Poking my head out

Hey all. I am going to be honest, I have been having a very difficult time lately with my anxiety. Like, really bad. I have had to cut myself off from social media and the news, and my husband and brother have been telling me what I need to know. But, last night something happened. I made dinner, then we watched an hour of television, then took Wyatt to our room where he has been sleeping with us (he has been having some episodes lately that could be seizures) and we watched another episode of Doc Martin while Wyatt slept. When the show was over, Billy got up to do some stuff before coming to bed. As I lay there though, I began to think I smelled gas. And sure enough, Billy checked and somehow the burner had been nudged over and had been releasing gas into the house probably since dinner. After an hour of airing out the house, with Wyatt wrapped up in blankets, we finally were rid of it, and Wyatt and I went back to bed, while Billy closed up again. As I lay there in bed this time, I realized that I was so anxious about what was happening in the world that I had failed to notice something very dangerous in my own home. Billy has a cold (no fever) and is congested and couldn’t smell it. Wyatt couldn’t tell me if he did notice. It was all up to me, and with my nerves, I somehow didn’t notice. Thank God that I did notice before we went to sleep. It really put things into a different perspective for me, that I need to slow down. It was a wake up call for sure.

I don’t know what I will be posting here in the coming weeks, or how often. I think I might post inspirational photos or quotes or poems for a while, with some of our life interposed.

I don’t want to talk about the thing that is happening, here though. I need to keep this a safe space for me. πŸ™‚

Know that I am thinking of all of you who I talk to here as well.


15 thoughts on “Poking my head out

  1. I am keeping my blog free of those anxiety inducing things as much as I can so feel free to visit me. πŸ˜‰ Trying to focus on lighthearted things, my fiction and some plain stupid things to make people laugh because I am in the same boat as you!. One day at a time for all of us. We have to focus on what we can control and try to leave what we can’t control behind, which is so very hard for me to do. Just know you are not alone!

    Liked by 1 person

      1. I need to do that! I am so glad you shared that with me! I never know if my ramblings mean anything to anyone and now I know something God has been working on me with is helping someone else. I’m writing that on a piece of paper tonight and taping it up too so I can see it throughout my day!


      2. Carolyn Thomas

        Perspective is a word that has been coming back to me a lot lately…. There’s so much to be grateful for, so much of life to be living in these quiet days together. I hope you enjoy the moments, and blessings on Wyatt. Love, Carolyn


  2. I do believe that our anxiety decreases when we can focus on what is right in front of us. The things we can control, like spending quality time with family; choosing books and movies that make us feel good; and limiting time spent on the news!

    Great story that illustrates the importance of seeing what is right in front of us and acting on what we can.

    Thanks for sharing.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Hi Jeannie! We have had gas our entire lives here and this is the first time it has ever happened. πŸ™‚ And you can smell it for sure, very distinctly. It is not pleasant! So normally people catch it right away. πŸ™‚ I did feel for big blessings last night. It was quite a revelation for me last night. And thank you.


  3. We had a thing where there was a smell of gas in the house and we think my husband didn’t light the oven properly or turn it off or something. We now have a gas leak detector in the house, after I freaked out! Only I could smell it!

    And I am hopefully keeping the book part of my blog on books and books only. The running posts might mention other stuff as my running is affected more easily by outside events. But there will be lots of lovely book reviews!


  4. I’m sorry you have been so anxious. I’m glad you caught the gas, very scary. You do what’s best for you. I was anxious when the craziness of hoarding started. I’m so thankful for my husband who’s been home since last Tuesday and who has been making sure we have food. Hugs, Erin.


  5. Switching off from the endless news coverage and social media chat is a good idea. Its overwhelming otherwise.
    One tip I was taught by a mindfulness tutor is that at the end of the day mentally revisit what you are thankful for that day. It doesn’t have to be big – but something that will give you a positive attitude to go to sleep


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